Once a year – your ex calls around! Has that happened to you, too?
There you sit unsuspectingly, together with your family by the Christmas tree, rejoice over the peace and relaxation after the pre-Christmas stress and then this: A message from your ex on the smartphone.
This is not an isolated case. And that’s why the phenomenon has a name. It’s called “Marleying” – and in fact, for two years, always during the Christmas season, it’s been hyped as a dating trend. What is behind it?
Text messages from your ex at Christmas
Since 2017, the trend Marleying has been haunting countries around the world. And in the truest sense of the word. Because Marleying actually owes its name to a ghost. The spirit Jacob Marley, who haunts the Christmas hater Scrooge. We’re talking about two characters from “A Christmas Carol”, a work by Charles Dickens. It’s one of the most famous Christmas stories ever.
But what does all this have to do with your ex?
There are relationships that fall apart, and you never hear from each other again. When, after weeks, months or even years, a long-lost lover suddenly contacts you – that’s truly strange. It feels like receiving a message from a ghost.
That’s what Marleying is. Especially during the Christmas season, many people think back to their broken relationships. Especially the one that felt really right. They had made plans together, goals and dreams. All this comes up during an emotional time like Christmas. And then there it is: a text message from the ex.
A British study has found that the dating trend Marleying is really not so uncommon. More than 4,000 adults were interviewed. A total of 11 percent has already been victims of Marleying. And at least 8 percent of the time, he or she admits to having been the perpetrator and to sending Christmas greetings to an ex-lover.
By the way: Marleying can hit anyone. At any time during the Advent weeks. Most of the messages, however, are sent on Christmas Eve. So be careful – maybe just turn off your smartphone on the 24th of December.
Marleying: A sad cause
As mentioned earlier, Marleying is the result of an emotional time. Another reason for sending a message to your ex, however, is something much sadder: loneliness. Especially when you return to your hometown at Christmas, where you’ve had so many beautiful moments. When you see the happy family and the happy couples. When the nights are long, and you miss someone to cuddle up – that’s when your ex-partners come back to the memory.
So, what to do? Before you turn into a Marley yourself and contact your lost love, treat yourself to a date. Paid Dating in Stuttgart or another city is so much fun and will soon make you forget about your loneliness. Thanks to websites for singles and online dating communities, it’s easier than ever to find someone for a short affair or a real relationship. No more reason to mourn old relationships.
And if you receive a message from the ex? Don’t panic! Don’t be too soft, but don’t be a stone. Sending back nice Christmas greetings is ok. But nothing more. This only raises false hopes. And a new love is much nicer than warming up old feelings, isn’t it?