You’ve just lost your big love? Then you are certainly going through the typical separation phases: From grief to anger all the way to longing – it’s all there. And with the longing, the loneliness or even the lack of sex, you suddenly get to the point where you wish to reconquer your ex. Find out in this article why this might not be such a good idea.
4 reasons why you want your ex back – and why that’s not good
- There was a reason for the separation. Whether you broke up or were dumped, there’s always a reason you choose to go your own way. No matter how bad you feel about your lost love, never forget why it ended. Because this reason will continue to exist even with a second attempt!
- You only remember the good times. And that’s a mistake. In separation phases, we tend to think about the first moments with our ex. Surely, there’s nothing wrong with that – you don’t have to curse your entire relationship. However, if you’re honest with yourself, you know that there were also some unpleasant or even nasty moments. And that they probably outweighed at the end of the relationship!
- Don’t act like a faithful dog. Unfortunately, one side of a relationship always suffers more after the separation. It doesn’t matter why. BUT: If you are this side, then there is the danger that you will start to run after your ex-partner. Don’t do that! You don’t just lose your dignity. In the worst case, you’re even really getting on his or her nerves.
- There’s no second time around. This is the most important thing about relationships. You get to know each other. You feel the butterflies. You get closer with each date. Both feel the excitement and the anticipation. All this will be missing if you actually reunite with your lost love. Very often, the time spent together after a second attempt is very sobering. And these are super nasty conditions to get back together.
Do you want your ex back? How to escape the dilemma
It’s super hard to deal with the grief of lost love. And it’s even harder to resist the urge to reconnect with your past love. But it works! Even if you may not believe it right now.
The important thing is not just sitting at home alone, sweltering in your grief. Try to distract yourself so that you don’t have these ex-thoughts in your head all the time.
How? For example, by meeting up with friends. Doing something fun with your family. Or start flirting with other singles. This will boost your self-confidence! And if more comes from it, you may even have some fun.